I think we can all agree that Family Matters was never a great show. It ran the gamut from overly sappy to just freaking weird. I have to admit that when Urkel was at the height of his popularity, I was just at the target age to find him hilarious, so in my mind, there's a weird mix of nostalgia mixed with embarrassment associated with this show.
However. I have a special nostalgia reserved for their Christmas episodes. They always used their trademark sappiness to their advantage when it came to Christmas. I have been disappointed that Nick at Nite has been showing episodes lately, but not Christmas episodes. However, I did manage to find one and DVR it. I don't remember this one specifically, but I'll watch and blog and see what we've got here.
Teaser: Richie taking bribes and telling family members where gifts are hidden.
After opening sequence: It's Christmas Eve. Winslow house is all decked out in Christmas cheer, but the patriarch isn't in the spirit because, he says, Christmas brings out the worst in people. As a cop, he's seeing the bottom of the barrel. Next scene reveals Urkel, wrapping gifts in the Winslow kitchen, who knows why. He's pretty muscular at this point, so I think we're mid-series. Urkel is anal about gift wrapping-- "Gifts are like fish- wrap them badly, and they stink." He's less than impressed with Carl's sloppy attempt to wrap a music box, so he offers to do it for him. I expect him to end up breaking the music box, but, to my surprise, it's Carl that breaks it, by dropping a heavier gift on top of it. Carl appears shell-shocked. Urkel has to gently prod him to go out and buy a new gift. He mentions they'll take the train, and you know as well as I do that sitcom characters only use public transportation when something bad is about to happen.
The people on the train are in very poor spirits. Fistfights, name calling, a drunk guy in a Santa suit, you get the picture. Carl makes the mistake of saying "things can't get any worse." That's NEVER a good thing to say! Immediately, the power goes out and the train grinds to a halt.
In a manner reminiscent of the episode of Full House with Christmas in the airport, Urkel attempts to rally everyone on the train car together to make the best of their predicament. However, he gets a more realistic response than Uncle Jesse did, in that everyone just glares at him like, "who is this nerd, and why won't he shut up?" One person even throws something at him.
Back at the Winslow homestead, the power is out there too. Grandma is reading the Christmas story from the Bible. They're worried about Dad.
Back on the train, Steve is trying to get the train passengers to sing "12 Days of Christmas." Only one guy takes him up on it, giving an enthusiastic "FIVE GOOOOOOOLDEN RIIIIIIIIIINGS." But by the time the song is over, people are threatening him with actual physical violence. Instead of sitting down and shutting up like most people would, he speechifies some more, but this time actually gets somewhere when he starts talking to people-- asks one woman about her grandchildren, another about her engagement ring. These very people who were threatening him moments before begin to soften. He then gets into "Christmas is a feeling, it can be anywhere" part of his speech, and yeah, he's ripping Uncle Jesse off wholesale. And by this time, the whole car has softened, and they set to work decorating a tree that someone had with him. As soon as everyone's spirits have been properly lifted, the train starts moving again. Huzzah! Carl starts singing "Hark the Herald Angel Sings," and this time everyone joins in. We fade out and credits roll without even checking in with the rest of the Winslows.
That... was a lot cheesier than I remembered the Christmas episodes being. Kind of disappointing.
Visuals: 1 out of 5
Spirit: 2 out of 5
Nostalgia: 2 out of 5
Humor: 2 out of 5
Music: 0 out of 5
Overall: 2 out of 5
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